Lucky Me!!! I'm 53! Living with melanoma and HOPE!!!

There is no sarcasm in the title.  None.  I have known unfortunate souls who bemoaned growing older, some when they were much younger than I am today!  I am not one of those!  Can aging result in loss of strength and ability?  Sure, you don't see many Olympians or Super Bowl stars on the field over the age of 30! Certain diseases and conditions are present ONLY in the elderly.  I am not one to believe that a mind set can change everything.  I don't buy the idea that you can think yourself young if you are old, cancer free if you are not!  I do contend that a positive attitude makes anything a lot more manageable!!!  Besides, getting older beats the hell out of the alternative!!!

So, yeah....Lucky me, I'm 53!!!

I will never consider myself lucky to have melanoma.  But, I AM lucky to have responded well to the interventions I have been fortunate to attain.

I am lucky I have grown children, who are bright and strong and healthy...who are working hard in love and life.  Learning that things are not always easy.  Standing tall for themselves and for others. Demonstrating a generosity of spirit to those around them.  Making a difference.  Living lives that make me proud to call them my friends.

I am lucky to be able to offer help and health to the children and families I work with daily.  Even more blessed to share laughs, fist bumps and slobbery kisses with my toddlers as well as shy admissions of future plans from teens I've had the honor to watch grow.

I am lucky to be in the position to provide basic, understandable information about melanoma to those in need, while, perhaps, offering a bit of hope in the process.

I am lucky to be able to maintain my running and other exercise endeavors.  Grateful to have a sweet daughter willing to invite me to join her in a weekly "barre" workout.  (If it doesn't kill us, Roo....we're going to be awesome!!!!)

I am lucky to have been able to spend this summer tackling and completing fun sewing projects. Baby Boy Brewer's afghan made it into his mom's arms before he did!  My 3 garments for the Summer of Basics Make-Along were completed before the August deadline.  I managed to keep Ruthie's special top a secret AND got it done in time for her special day!!

Dental checks, car tags, yard work, household projects, annual continuing education requirements for my licensure...have been recently checked off the to-do list.  Yes, I count the ability to take care of the mundane - lucky!!!!

I am lucky to have read the Complete Short Stories of Ernest Hemingway this summer. Yes, it took a couple of months...which is a bit uncharacteristic of me.  The stories were not terribly complicated or long, but the emotional scale took me a minute to ponder, digest, and deal with. This 'short' story, most often attributed to Hemingway, is an example of what I mean ~   "For sale:  baby shoes, never worn."

I am lucky to have had the time and energy to work extra for a fellow provider who needed to be off.

I am lucky to have been able to contribute my small part, with my one voice, to speak out for those who cannot, in the battle to attain, continue, and improve healthcare for all.

I am lucky to have been able to enjoy nature and friendship with my best bud, on ever so many walks over the years, but the beauty we recently shared in Shenandoah was particularly poignant.

I am lucky to have my now annual scans scheduled for the end of this month, ostensibly approved by the wise and wonderful folks at Blue Cross Blue Shield, who have often balked at covering my care, but have had no trouble whatsoever cashing my premium payments monthly since I was 18 years old.

I am lucky to be looking forward to ringing in 29 years with my B at the end of this month!

I am lucky to have managed to find a way, gathered the strength, foolishly believed enough....I don't really know...to continue to create and enjoy small plans and hope for my future.  It has not been easy, as I wrote in this post Looking Forward, from 2010.  There I mentioned I have always told myself and my kids, "Live each day as though there will be no other, and you will have no regrets."  As such, I keep working on my own possibilities.

I am lucky to have dear ones, "...who keep ever burning before my vagrant steps, the kindly light of hope."

Hope - that enigmatic force that allows us to believe that tomorrow can be better, that our words and actions can make a difference, that while all things may not be perfect, there can be joy and beauty for us - still.

Ruthie, shared this with me a bit ago....

"Your opponents would love you to believe that it's hopeless, that you have no power, that there's no reason to act, that you can't win.  Hope is a gift you don't have to surrender, a power you don't have to throw away."                  ~  Rebecca Solnit, from:  Hope in the Dark.

Yes, lucky indeed to be 53!  Living with hope today...looking forward to what's next. - c

Travel Chaotically! - Shenandoah and salamander sushi?????

On our last day of hiking in Shenandoah, we decided to take Rose River Loop (about 3.5 miles) with a little detour to see Dark Hollow Falls.

Often the forest in Shenandoah is much more open than it is in the Smokies.  Aren't the ferns pretty?

Hard to believe, but this morning was cool enough to warrant a jacket!!!

On leaving Dark Hollow Falls, we rejoined the Rose River Trail, following it along the bank for some time.  After a bit, as the trail began to rise above, though still alongside the river, I heard weird clanking noises!!  Like a slamming car door, but with a higher pitch.  In the middle of the woods???? Then, I looked down....

Mr. Bear was busily looking under rocks for his lunch!!! Slurping away!
No wonder red salamanders are hard to find!

How Bentie looks after seeing a bear!!!

My travel adventures always start me thinking...  This quote Ruthie shared with me, captures a piece of that pondering perfectly:

Why do  you go away?  So that you can come back. So that you can see the place you came from with new eyes and extra colors.                     ~  Terry Pratchett,  A Hat Full of Sky.

Thanks for sharing your peace and incredible beauty, Shenandoah.  I will remember it always for itself and for enhancing the depth of my understanding and appreciation for walks in "my" woods.  Love, les

Travel Chaotically! - Day 3, Shenandoah - Lions, tigers and bears! Oh my!!!

Day 3 found us on Stony Man Trail, including the Passmaquoddy, to make a 3.5 mile circuit.

So pretty!!!

So stony!

So incredible!

I have looked and looked for this plant - Indian Pipe, also called Ghost Plant - in the Smokies, but had never seen it 'til now!  It is a weird little plant that contains no chlorophyll, and lives off a fungi that is in turn living off the roots of trees, often beeches.  Weird, huh?  
The more you know!!!

And this my friends, is called Doll's Eyes!! Or you can use the dull name of White Baneberry, or the fancy one of Actaea pachypoda.  It has white flowers in the spring, that give way over summer to these berries.  Another plant I have not seen in the Smokies, but like the Indian Pipe, knew on sight from seeing it in my wildflower books!!  (Thanks, Granny and Don!!!)

Stony Man Trail, as is often the case in Shenandoah...had many steep ups and downs....often along some height...giving way to glorious vistas.  It is easier to find short (3 miles or so, vs 6-7 miles or greater) 'loop' trails here in Shenandoah, that take you from the forest floor to stony peaks, than is the case in much of the Smokies. But, you do make up for the shorter distance with some pretty significant climbs!!!  After the morning's exertion, we took the super easy Limberlost Trial in the afternoon.  It is lovely and fully wheelchair accessible. Our adventure was a 1.5 mile walk since we took a little detour down the Crescent Rock Trail.

Limberlost gives you a great view of  a geologic formation called "columnar jointing" that occurs when volcanic rock cools and contracts.  So much to see and think about!!!

A lot to think about indeed, as we rounded a bend, I thought, "Where the heck is your mother??!!!" when I spied two small cubs digging for grubs alongside the trail!!!

B got these two pics while we slowly backed away.  As we did, I saw Momma tromping through the bush as her little charges ran back to join her!!!

After giving everybody space and time to regroup, we were back on the trail.  Throughout our walks I had been searching for salamanders.  We saw stations with signs stating they were monitoring "amphibians" in some fashion.  I saw a huge flock of turkeys that were gone before B could see them and blended too well into the darker under growth for my phone's camera to pick them up.  I saw medium sized trout in every stream.  Birds of all sorts, including a brilliant male scarlet tanager during my rock scramble!  But, I wanted to see one of those bright orange salamanders!!!

He's not bright orange.  But, I was pleased to see this little guy!!

Making our way back to the Lodge along Skyline Drive...we found this fellow, rooting about for a bit of supper!

We may not have had the lions and tigers....but there were plenty of bears....and soooooo many wonderful things!  Oh, my!!! - les

An Ode to Charlottesville

I put my Shenandoah posts together before the horror and hatred erupted in Charlottesville. I have no idea how someone can drive through the beauty that is Virginia and not be touched...have the hatred in their heart erased.  But, there are many things I do not understand.  However, I know this to be true:

"The Nazis, the KKK, and white supremacists are repulsive and evil, and all of us have a moral obligation to speak out against the lies, bigotry, anti-Semitism, and hatred that they propagate."

You probably think that phrase is something I would say, yes?  But....  I didn't!  Ted Cruz did!  Way to go, Ted!!! (Now those are words I REALLY thought I'd never say!)  

My recent visit to Virginia refreshed my soul.  I hope time, the support of the rest of the nation, and the beauty of your land can mend your spirit, Charlottesville.   Much love, c 

#altrightisallwrong   #lovetrumpshate   #noracism  #charlottesville 

Travel Chaotically! - More fun at Shenandoah National Park - or - all things great and small...

After the fun of the rock scramble along the Bearfence Mountain trail, which was only about a mile all total...we headed out in the early afternoon to the Hawksbill Loop Trail for a little 3 mile hike, part of it along the AT! Here's some of what we saw!!!

Is there a flower more graceful than the Columbine?

A precursor of sights to come....

The flowers and the butterflies were nutters!!!

I had read of these rock formations, called a 'talus slope' or 'scree', where rocks have basically tumbled down the mountain.  But, had never seen one ~ til now!!!

These areas were hot and sunny (given the absence of tree cover) and had their own little ecosystem with very different vegetation.

Crazy, right????

Shooting butterflies!!!

On top of the world ~ with grand vistas, beautiful flowers, and incredible butterflies!

Heading back down into the cool, green woods, we found other inhabitants!

"Who you look'in at???"

And while driving back to the Lodge...these fabulous Turks Cap Lilies!!  Loveliness along the roadside!!!

A fit ending to a magnificent day spent enjoying nature's glory.

So fortunate to have experienced another day in appreciation of all things....great and small. - les