Saturday, July 11, 2015

Lame, lazy PhD student!

Found this posted on my blog...twice:  

"Greetings, My name is Dr. Dana Hansen, Assistant Professor of Nursing at Kent State University. You can learn more about me by visiting my faculty web page at We are contacting you because you are listed as the contact person of the blog. My research team and I are interested in learning about the family caregiver’s experience with reading their loved one’s illness blog. A family caregiver is someone who provides emotional, spiritual, or physical care or support to a loved one. I was inspired to conduct this research during my sister-in-law’s journey through breast cancer. After interacting on her blog, I began to wonder what it was like for her husband (family caregiver) to read her blog. The family caregiver of the person who is writing the illness blog can find out more about our study by going to our study website: There is a screen for you to share your contact information if you are"

On the surface, that all seems a worthy process, innocuous at best, if poorly written.  I have had the incredibly horrible, beautiful, emotional experience of helping families allow their children to die.  It was difficult for me and other staff.  I cannot begin to imagine how dreadful and heart rending it was for the families...even though I was there, watching, working, and supporting patient and family as best I could.  When you add that to my own life experiences, I am more than aware of the the need for nurses and other providers to know what the family and patients truly need and feel during those difficult times.  Yet, something about this chick's approach and the description of her own odds with what is posted in her message....rankled!  So....I wrote her this!!!

Dear Dana,

So, let me get this straight:  You are working on your PhD.  And in your own words:  "The purpose of my research is to explore family interactions and relationships at the end life.  Often, families are uncertain of what to say or how to interact with their dying loved one during this difficult and stressful time.  Ultimately, I hope to discover important and unique aspects of family relationships at the end of life that will improve care of both the patient and family."  

 So, it would seem like you would bother to read at least a bit of the blog you are posting your lazy (no actual links to your addresses, exactly the same blurb used repeatedly) message on, to ascertain if there is really someone DYING (more rapidly than you are, for instance) on the blog in question!!!  But, no.  You didn't.  I am heartened only by the fact that looking at your bio, you don't appear to provide patient care.  That is a really good thing.  Sadly, if you actually attain your PhD you may have access to nursing students and curriculum development.  That would be a shame indeed.  However, I will be reaching out to your professors at Kent State.  If their motto is "Excellence in Action" this is it's antithesis!

And in case you are wondering who I am, since I am certain you haven't bothered to keep a record of the blogs you have left your message on, or the number of times you left that message, I am Celeste Morris, RN, MSN C-PNP.  I have taught nursing students how to provide complete, thoughtful, compassionate care with integrity.  I also provide pediatric care daily utilizing basic nursing skills, the knowledge of development and disease in children, and 30 plus years of experience, never failing to remain cognizant of my responsibility to respect the LIVES of my patients and their families, rather than assuming they are at the END of theirs, no matter what their diagnosis may be.  And, yes, I have Stage IV melanoma.

Your work could be valuable.  Your approach is lame and lazy.  You have a typo in your consent form and eligibility criteria as well as a missing word in your mission statement. Sad.  Perhaps this will jog your memory of who I am and teach you something about how great a nurse can really be, especially to a person with Stage IV disease.

My blog and a real nurse

Perhaps your PhD work will prove a learning experience after all.  C

SO!  Ruthie, Rosie, Freddo and B!! Sign up. Go for it. 
Get your 50 bucks!!!  You've certainly wasted plenty of time reading my crap!!!  You have my blessing alive and well, but I'll be dead make the big ones while you can.  Any other peeps out there who can meet this criteria????????

Eligibility: You are eligible for the study if you meet the following criteria: 
  • Your and your loved one are 18 years or older; 
  • The blogger must have a diagnosis of cancer, congestive heart failure (CHF), chronic obstructive lung disease (COPD), or human immunodeficiency virus (HIV)/acquired immunodeficiency syndrome (AIDS);
  • The blogs must be written in English with a minimum of 1 posting per month;
  • The family caregiver must participate in the blog by responding to the blog or reading the blog.
Make fifty bucks!  I am serious as a heart attack in an AID's patient having trouble breathing while dying of cancer!!!!  Good thing I view most of life as funny as hell!!  Hope I made you laugh.  Lord knows, we all need to.  So, thanks, "Dr." Dana!  I'll be in touch!!! - c

1 comment:

  1. How can this person actually be awarded a PhD? And why did they choose a medical career? I have so many questions! Haha! Well, I don't need $50 that bad!